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Comedy (II)
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★ Comedy (II)

ET, what is the meaning of this?  Ive just received this memo.  You young poopie.  In the one day since you inherited Global Oil youve managed to dispose of assets worth over $6,000,000.  What is this?  All annual profits to the donated to the Brothers of the Soil Commune in Wales, England.  All petroleum and oil to be sold at a retail price of 2p.  All profits to be given tax free to anyone nice you can find.  ibid.  Rick as Mr Malvinas to Neil as ET

 

At one stage she even took her bra off.  ibid.  Rick

 

 

I shall write to the lead singer of Echo and the Bunnymen.  The Young Ones s2e5: Sick, Rick

 

We never clean the toilet, Neil.  That’s what being a student is all about.  ibid.  Rick

 

We sow the seed right.  Nature grows the seed.  And we eat the seed …  ibid.  Neil

 

 

Do you think ants go to discos?  The Young Ones s2e6: Summer Holiday *****  Vyvyan to Mike in garden

 

Vyvyan: Aha!  You’d have to get up pretty early in the morning to catch you out, Michael.

 

Michael: You’d have to stay up all night.  ibid.

 

God, I’m bored ... Even mindless violence seems boring today.  ibid.  Vyvyan

 

I’m bored and deserve to die.  This is the end.  Armageddon!  No future!  ibid.

 

Neil outside Fascist Pig Bank: Mike, Mike, don’t you think like you know robbing a bank is like tantamount to stealing really, isn’t it?

 

Rick: Yeah, come on, let’s do it!  White riot!  Stand down, Margaret!  I’m a child of the recession and I’ve got hate in my eyes.  Ask for me tomorrow and I’ll be gone ’cause I’m on a one-way ticket to oblivion and I’m going to raise hell getting there.

 

Mike: Right.

 

Rick: Yeah.

 

Mike: Now let’s get in there and do it.

 

Rick: Yeah!

 

Mike: Yeah!

 

Rick: What, you mean now?  ibid.

 

[boys aboard getaway red bus] Right on.  I’m aboard the freedom bus heading for Good-Time City.  And I haven’t even paid my fair! ... Yes, yes, girls like Una Stubbs.  What’s the difference?  They’ll be plenty of chicks for these tigers on the road to the Promised Land.  This is it!  It’s really happening!  Who needs qualifications?  Who cares about Thatcher?  Unemployment: we can do exactly whatever we want to do.  And do you know why?  Because we’re young ones.  Bachelor boys.  Crazy, mad, wild, big-bottomed anarchists!  Look out, Cliff!  [red bus tips over cliff and explodes] Phew!  That was close!  ibid.

 

 

When the Young Ones exploded on to our screens in 1982 its unique brand of anarchic slapstick, potty-mouthed humor and surrealist asides gave British comedy a great big kick up the ass.  How the Young Ones Changed Comedy, Yesterday 2020

 

It redefined the comedy rule book.  Safe studio sitcoms would never be the same again.  ibid.

 

The Young Ones revolution still reverberates today.  ibid.

 

Small ads: The Comedy Club ad WANTED: COMEDIANS WANTED for new comedy and improvisation club opening W1.  Call Peter Rose 01-637 8135.  ibid.  

 

‘I just bombed horribly.  And the act on after me was Rik Mayall.’  ibid.  Alexei Sayle    

 

Another double act – Nigel Planer and Peter Richardson … played over 40 characters.  ibid. 

 

Out Go the Lights: It was to be the fist time the nation would be exposed to the intense poetry of Rik.  And also the guitar-strumming hippy played by Nigel Planer.  ibid.

 

‘Peter [Richardson] had a falling out with Paul Jackson.’  ibid.  Lise Mayer, co-writer Young Ones

 

The Young Ones pilot episode first draft January 1981.  ibid.  Ben Elton & Rick Mayall read from script

 

Channel 4’s remit as the new kid on the TV block was to offer alternative entertainment, and Peter Richardson’s The Comic Strip was the perfect fit.  ibid.  

 

‘Listen, man, sleep gives you cancer, everyone knows that.’  ibid.  Neil to Rick in the broom cupboard    

 

‘We wanted to give people something that they might have missed first time around.  And if you roll backwards and forwards on the VHS which of course you can’t do when you watch the programme go out, you might … [the fifth housemate].’  ibid.  Geoff Posner, director

 

On paper the Young Ones was a cartoon comedy world where anything could happen but they had to perform each scene and stunt in front of a live studio audience.  ibid.

 

Alternative comedy was the new rock n roll [viz Spinal Tap] but it wasn’t just because of the Young Ones [viz Comic Strip]  ibid.        

 

In 1984 the second series was launched.  ibid.

 

‘The BBC got a phenomenal number of complaints.’  ibid.  Lise Mayer    

 

‘The daring of that was remarkable.’  ibid.  Alexie Sayle

 

 

Welcome to Royston Vasey  You’ll Never Leave!  The League of Gentlemen s1e1: Welcome to Royston Vasey, street sign, BBC 1999

 

Royston Vasey next stop.  This is the end of the line.  ibid.  bloke on train

 

Are you local?  ibid.  Tubbs

 

Don’t touch the things.  This is a local shop for local people.  ibid.

 

What’s all this shouting?  We’ll have no trouble here.  ibid.  Edward

 

He has a plan.  He covets the precious things of the shop.  ibid.

 

This is a decent town and a local shop.  There is nothing for you here.  ibid.

 

In this house we don’t masturbate.  ibid.  host

 

Poofter, eh?  ibid.

 

 

Are you local?  The League of Gentlemen s1e2: The Road To Royston Vasey, Tubbs

 

This is a local shop for local people.  There’s nothing for you here.  ibid.

 

To be honest I think I favour internal protection over towels.  ibid.  Barbara the cab driver

 

 

Hello, hello, Tubs, what’s going on?  What’s all this shouting?  We’ll have no trouble here.  How many more times, Tubbs, this is a local shop, mmm, for local people.  The League of Gentlemen s1e3: Nightmare in Royston Vasey s1e3, Edward

 

For ever indulging himself in the pleasures of the palm.  ibid.  host

 

Royston Vasey Roundabout Zoo Nature’s Wonders In The Heart Of Town.  ibid.  sign

 

I’m going to stop your road, Tubbs.  Once and for all.  ibid.  Edward

 

If God had meant us to walk everywhere he wouldn’t have given us Little Chefs.  ibid.  Vicar

 

 

Have you not heard about the Beast of Royston Vasey?  Not me.  They dug something up working on the new road.  The League of Gentlemen s1e4: The Beast of Royston Vasey, Barbara the cab driver

 

Perhaps if you’d spent a little less time cavorting with Madam Palm and her five lovely daughters.  ibid.  Uncle

 

Hands up who’s gay.  ibid.  Theatre player to school-children

 

Dykes on the other hand are evil.  ibid.

 

We could kill them all.  ibid.  Tubbs

 

 

Hello, Bab’s cabs.  The League of Gentlemen s1e5: Love Comes To Royston Vasey, Bab

 

 

I’d like to buy it all.  Everything in the shop.  The League of Gentlemen s1e6: Escape from Royston Vasey s1e6, son to mother in local shop

 

Good morning, jobseekers.  ibid.  Pauline

 

The toad can teach us many lessons.  It’s lifecycle is a model of order and simplicity.  ibid.

 

 

[dwarfs enter local shop] Tell them the circus is coming to town.  The League of Gentlemen s2e1: Destination: Royston Vasey

 

Tubbs: Yes?  Morning.  Can I help you at all?  [sees dwarfs in shop]  Ah!  Edward!  Edward!  ibid.

 

Edward: Hello, hello, what’s going on?  What’s all this shouting?  We’ll have no trouble here ... They are not children!  They are monsters! ... Get out, get out, do you hear me, this is a local shop for local people, there’s nothing for you here.  Demons!  ibid.

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