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Parents
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★ Parents

My father was a dope fiend and an alcoholic.  My mother she didnt give a fuck.  She let my father beat on her and beat on me and my sisters.  She wouldnt say anything.  She wouldnt do anything.  I havent spoken to them in ten years and I dont care to.  They dont give a damn about me right now.  They had sixteen years to love me and treat me like a son and much less treat me like a human being, and they couldnt do it then, and they couldnt do it now.  Marc Singer, Dark Days, music DJ Singer, 2000

 

 

Unreasonable creatures feed their young.  William Shakespeare, III Henry VI II ii, Clifford

 

 

The bond cracked between son and father.  William Shakespeare, The History of King Lear I ii @108

 

 

Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee.  Exodus 20:12

 

 

And he that smiteth his father, or his mother, shall be surely put to death.

 

And he that stealeth a man, and selleth him, or if he be found in his hand, he shall surely be put to death.

 

And he that curseth his father, or his mother, shall surely be put to death.  Exodus 21:15-17

 

 

And he that curseth his father, or his mother, shall surely be put to death.  Exodus 21:17

 

 

For every one that curseth his father or his mother shall be surely put to death: he hath cursed his father or his mother; his blood shall be upon him.  Leviticus 20:9

 

 

Hearken unto thy father that begat thee, and despise not thy mother when she is old.  Proverbs 23:22

 

 

Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.

 

Honour thy father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise;   

 

That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.

 

And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.  Ephesians 6:1-4  

 

 

And We have commended unto man kindness toward parents.  His mother beareth him with reluctance, and bringeth him forth with reluctance, and the bearing of him and the weaning of him is thirty months, till, when he attaineth full strength and reacheth forty years, he saith: My Lord!  Arouse me that I may give thanks for the favour wherewith Thou hast favoured me and my parents, and that I may do right acceptable unto Thee.  And be gracious unto me in the matter of my seed.  Lo!  I have turned unto Thee repentant, and lo!  I am of those who surrender (unto Thee).

 

And whoso saith unto his parents: Fie upon you both!  Do ye threaten me that I shall be brought forth (again) when generations before me have passed away?  And they twain cry unto Allah for help (and say): Woe unto thee!  Believe!  Lo! the promise of Allah is true.  But he saith: This is naught save fables of the men of old:  Koran 46:15&17

 

 

I, Nephi, having been born of goodly parents, therefore I was taught somewhat in all the learning of my father; and having seen many afflictions in the course of my days, nevertheless, having been highly favored of the Lord in all my days; yea, having had a great knowledge of the goodness and the mysteries of God, therefore I make a record of my proceedings in my days.  Book of Mormon: Nephi 1:1

 

 

There is ample evidence to show that children raised by same-gender parents fare as well as those raised by heterosexual parents.  More than 25 years of research have documented that there is no relationship between parents’ sexual orientation and any measure of a childs emotional, psychosocial, and behavioral adjustment.  These data have demonstrated no risk to children as a result of growing up in a family with one or more gay parents.  Conscientious and nurturing adults, whether they are men or women, heterosexual or homosexual, can be excellent parents.  The rights, benefits, and protections of civil marriage can further strengthen these families.  The American Academy of Pediatrics, 2006  

 

 

I feel sure that unborn babies pick their parents.  Gloria Swanson

 

 

Has there ever been another art so devoutly converted into a science as the art of parenting.

 

Over the recent decades, a vast and diverse flock of parenting experts has arisen.  Stephen D Levitt & Stephen J Dubner, Freakonomics

 

No one is more susceptible to an expert’s fearmongering than a parent.  Fear is in fact a major component of the act of parenting.  ibid.

 

The most radical shift in the conventional wisdom of parenting has been provoked by one simple question: how much do parents really matter?   ibid.

 

How much can those eager parents actually accomplish for their children’s sake?  ibid.

 

Harris argued, albeit gently, that parents are wrong to think they contribute so mightily to their child’s personality.  This belief, she wrote, was a ‘cultural myth’.  Harris argued that the top-down influence of parents is overwhelmed by the grassroots effects of peer pressure, the blunt force applied each day by friends and schoolmates.  ibid.

 

Parents must matter, you tell yourself.  Besides, even if peers exert so much influence on a child, isn’t it the parents who essentially choose a child’s peers?  Isn’t that why parents agonize over the right neighbourhood, the right school, the right circle of friends?  ibid.

 

And is it true that the students left behind in neighbourhood schools suffered?  No: they continued to test at about the same levels as before the supposed brain drain.  ibid.

 

But it isn’t so much a matter of what you do as a parent, it’s who you are.  ibid.

 

So does the name you give your child affect his life?  Or is it your life reflected in his name?  In either case, what kind of signal does a child’s name send to the world – and most important, does it really matter?  ibid.  

 

 

In Sheffield twelve families live together.  But these are no ordinary families.  And this is no ordinary house.  This is the only family rehab in the UK.  More children than ever are being taken into care because their parents are addicted to drugs or alcohol.  Addicted Parents: Last Chance to Keep My Children I: Mums, BBC 2017

 

There are many rules to adjust to in the house.  ibid.

 

‘I would imagine people would not understand why people go repeatedly on to have children when they’ve not looked after the first, the second, the third, the fourth …  ibid.  key worker

 

‘Too many children, not enough parenting.’  ibid.  18 year old son

 

 

Parents and children stay in a therapeutic community confronting addiction together.  Addicted Parents: Last Chance to Keep My Children II: Family

 

Social services issued an ultimatum  give up drugs and go to rehab, or lose Kyle.  ibid.  

 

 

They are the most notorious parents in America today accused of torturing, abusing and imprisoning twelve of their thirteen children.  Early on Sunday January 14th police in California are called to the home of the reclusive Turpin family and make an horrific discovery: 13 children, most are starving, some are shackled to beds.  Their parents, David and Louise Turpin, are arrested.  Tortured by Mum & Dad: The Turpin 13, Channel 5 2018

 

As children they were subjected to sexual abuse.  ibid.

 

 

Our son doesn’t know who Boz Scaggs is.  We’ve failed as parents.  Breaking Bad s2e4: Down, Walter to Skyler, AMC 2009

 

 

As far as I’m concerned, the two of you can both dissolve in a vat of acid.  Ozark s2e9: The Badger, Charlotte to mum and dad

 

 

I am on my way to go and meet a family who desribe themselves as being unconventional.  My understanding at this point is that the kids don’t go to school, they’re not home-schooled, it’s a child-led parenting.  No rules, very lose, they’ll eat when they want, they go to sleep when they want.  They don’t vaccine the kids.  Stacey Dooley Sleeps Over s1e3: The Family Without Rules, W 2019

 

The whole family sleeps in the bed together.  ibid.

 

The kids are animated.  ibid.

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