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★ Grammar

Grammar: see Language & Words & Rhetoric & Communication & Literature & Society & History & William Shakespeare & Punctuation & Quotation & Spelling

Samuel Johnson - The Human Spark - Gilles Deleuze - Philip Howard - Noam Chomsky - Carl Sandburg - Friedrich Nietzsche - Mark Twain - Benjamin Disraeli - H L Mencken - Jason Chamberlain - Zadie Smith - Baltasar Gracian - Douglas Adams - Edgar Allan Poe - William Safire - Jack Kerouac - Lynn Truss - Winston Churchill - John Green - Gertrude Stein - Dorothy L Sayers - Kurt Vonnegut - Robert Graves - A P Martinich - Thomas Binkley - George Cardona - Oliver Goldsmith -    

 

 

78,448.  I have labored to refine our language to grammatical purity, and to clear it from colloquial barbarisms, licentious idioms, and irregular combinations.  (Language & Grammar)  Samuel Johnson, cited The Rambler 14th March 1752

 

 

6,088.  Grammar is what makes human language critical to igniting the human spark.  (Evolution & Human Being & Grammar & Language)  The Human Spark III: Brain Matters

 

6,089.  It takes perhaps ten or fifteen years for the brain to organise itself to process grammar swiftly and efficiently.  (Evolution & Human Being & Brain & Grammar)  ibid.

 

 

6,320.  Forming grammatically correct sentences is for the normal individual the prerequisite for any submission to social laws.  No one is supposed to be ignorant of grammaticality; those who are belong in special institutions.  The unity of language is fundamentally political.  (Self & Language & Grammar & Society & Life's Like That)  Gilles Deleuze, Thousand Plateaus: Capitalism and Schizophrenia
 

 

75,019.  1.  Correct speling is essential.

2.  Don’t use no double negatives.

3.  Verbs has got to agree with their subjects.

4.  Don’t run on sentences they are hard to read.

5.  About them sentence fragments.

6.  Don’t use commas, that aren’t necessary.

7.  Remember to not ever split infinitives.

8.  A preposition is not a good word to end a sentence with.

9.  Writing carefully, dangling participles must be avoided.

10.  Always use apostrophe’s correctly.

11.  Make each singular pronoun agree with their antecedents.

12.  Join clauses good, like a conjunction should.

13.  Proofread your writing to make sure you don’t words out.

And, above all, avoid cliches like the plague.  Philip Howard, The Thirteen Gremlins of Grammar

 

 

75,020.  The notion ‘grammatical’ cannot be identified with ‘meaningful’ or ‘significant’ in any semantic sense.  Sentences (1) and (2) are equally nonsensical, but ... only the former is grammatical.

 

(1)  Colourless green ideas sleep furiously.

 

(2)  Furiously sleep ideas green colourless.  Noam Chomsky, Syntactic Structures 1957

 

 

75,045.  It’s perfectly obvious that there is some genetic factor that distinguishes humans from other animals and that it is language-specific.  The theory of that genetic component, whatever it turns out to be, is what is called universal grammar.  Noam Chomsky

 

 

75,047.   Descriptive grammar is an attempt to give an account of what the current system is for either a society or an individual, whatever you happen to be studying.  Noam Chomsky

 

 

75,021.  I never made a mistake in grammar but one in my life and as soon as I done it I seen it.  Carl Sandburg

 

 

75,022.  I fear we are not getting rid of God because we still believe in grammar.  Friedrich Nietzsche

 

 

75,023.  Ignorant people think it’s the noise which fighting cats make that is so aggravating, but it ain’t so; it’s the sickening grammar they use.  (Grammar & Ignorant)  Mark Twain

 

 

75,024.  I don’t give a damn for a man that can only spell a word one way.  Mark Twain

 

 

75,040.  ‘Which is him?’  The grammar was faulty, maybe, but we could not know, then, that it would go in a book someday.  Mark Twain, Roughing It

 

 

75,025.  I will not go down to posterity talking bad grammar.  Benjamin Disraeli



75,026.  Correct spelling, indeed, is one of the arts that are far more esteemed by schoolma’ams than by practical men, neck-deep in the heat and agony of the world.  H L Mencken, The American Language

 

 

75,027.  Morals and manners will rise or decline with our attention to grammar.  Jason Chamberlain 1811                      

 

 

75,028.  The past is always tense, the future perfect.  Zadie Smith

 

 

75,029.  A synonym is a word you use when you can’t spell the other one.  Baltasar Gracián

 

 

75,030.  One of the major problems encountered in time travel is not that of becoming your own father or mother.  There is no problem in becoming your own father or mother that a broad-minded and well-adjusted family can’t cope with.  There is no problem with changing the course of history – the course of history does not change because it all fits together like a jigsaw.  All the important changes have happened before the things they were supposed to change and it all sorts itself out in the end.

 

The major problem is simply one of grammar, and the main work to consult in this matter is Dr Dan Streetmentioner’s Time Traveler’s Handbook of 1001 Tense Formations.  It will tell you, for instance, how to describe something that was about to happen to you in the past before you avoided it by time-jumping forward two days in order to avoid it.  The event will be described differently according to whether you are talking about it from the standpoint of your own natural time, from a time in the further future, or a time in the further past and is further complicated by the possibility of conducting conversations while you are actually traveling from one time to another with the intention of becoming your own mother or father.

 

Most readers get as far as the Future Semiconditionally Modified Subinverted Plagal Past Subjunctive Intentional before giving up; and in fact in later aditions of the book all pages beyond this point have been left blank to save on printing costs.

 

The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy skips lightly over this tangle of academic abstraction, pausing only to note that the term ‘Future Perfect’ has been abandoned since it was discovered not to be.  Douglas Adams, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe

 

 

75,032.  And all dared to brave unknown terrors, to do mighty deeds, to boldly split infinitives that no man had split before – and thus was the Empire forged.  Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

 

 

75,031.  A man’s grammar, like Caesar’s wife, should not only be pure, but above suspicion of impurity.  Edgar Allan Poe

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