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The Cook The Thief His Wife & Her Lover 1989 - Terry-Thomas TV - John Mortimer & Rumpole of the Bailey TV - America on a Plate: The Story of the Diner TV - Tommy Cooper - Muhammad Ali - The Sun - Monty Pythons The Meaning of Life 1983 - The Catherine Tate Show TV - Big Night 1996 - George Orwell - Arthur Miller - Spicing Up Britain: How Eating Out Went Exotic - Timeshift TV - Spy 2015 - Spitting Image TV - Jiro Dreams of Sushi 2011 - All You Can Eat: Secrets of the World’s Mega Buffet TV - Inside the World’s Greatest Hotels TV - Inside ... Nandos TV - Better Call Saul TV - Horizon TV - Inside the Ritz TV - House of Cards TV - Andrew F Smith -  

 

 

 

Albert, leave him alone.  Come on, let’s eat.  The Cook, The Thief, His Wife & Her Lover 1989 starring Helen Mirren & Alan Howard & Richard Bohringer & Tim Roth & Michael Gambon & Ian Drury & Cairan Hinds & Gary Olsen & Ewan Stewart & Liz Smith et al, director Peter Greenway, Georgina to Albert

 

Don’t smoke.  It’s sloppy in a woman.  Besides, no-one is gonna eat smokes – it ruins your taste-buds, burns your tongue and makes your pee stink.  ibid.  Albert to Georgina

 

Good cook.  Except he will put mushrooms on everything.  ibid.  Albert at table

 

Money’s my business, eating’s my pleasure.  ibid.

 

You’re so talkative tonight we couldn’t stand the silence without you.  Wash your hands!  ibid.

 

I bet human milk’s a great delicacy in some countries.  It ought to be here.  ibid.  

 

I like a quiet restaurant with floor shows.  ibid.  Terry at table

 

I’ll kill him and I’ll eat him.  ibid.  Albert

 

What good are all these books to you?  You can’t eat them.  ibid.  her to him

 

Could you cook him?  ibid.  Georgina to Chef

 

Eating black food is like consuming death.  ibid.  Chef

 

Have all those carefully learnt table manners gone to waste?  ibid.  Georgina to Albert

 

 

Ill have the flesh!  Terry-Thomas, to waiter and slavering over woman at dinner table

 

The brain of the calf, the liver of the chicken, the legs of the frog, the hoof of the mountain goat in jelly …  ibid.  Terry-Thomas to Ian Carmichael at table

 

 

So it is not often that I am confronted with the sort of fare photographed in the Sunday supplements.  I scarcely ever sit down to an octagonal plate on which a sliver of monkfish is arranged in a composition of pastel shades, which also features a brush stroke of pink sauce, a single peeled prawn and a sprig of dill.  Such gluttony is, happily, beyond my means.  John Rumpole, Rumpole a la Carte

 

I find your restaurant pretentious and your portions skimpy.  Your customers regale themselves in a dim religious atmosphere more fitting to evensong than a good night out.  ibid.  Rumpole to Chef

 

 

On a cold December night in 1941 an artist stood on the sidewalk in Manhattan gazing through the plate glass window of an all-night diner … Hopper set out to capture a very American loneliness.  America on a Plate: The Story of the Diner, BBC 2013

 

The American diner is a bit like that Dodge City saloon – it preserves a vital fragment of the American spirit.  ibid.

 

The diner began as a restaurant on the move.  ibid.

 

Richard’s restored more than eighty abandoned luncheonettes.  ibid.

 

The diner became the battleground in the civil rights war.  ibid.

 

 

I went into a French restaurant and asked the waiter, ‘Have you got frog’s legs?’  He said, ‘Yes.’  So I said, ‘Well hop into the kitchen and get me a cheese sandwich.’  Tommy Cooper

 

 

Now I’m going to go in there with my medal on to see if I can eat, put them on the spot.  So I went in, sat down and said, ‘I want two hamburgers.’  They said, ‘We don’t serve Negroes.’  I said, ‘I don’t eat them either.  I want two hamburgers.’  Muhammad Ali, interview David Frost, The Then and Now of Muhammad Ali

 

 

You Trust Dont Get It Capello: The Granita was the Islington restaurant where Tony Blair and Gordon Brown came to their infamous leadership pact ... The San Lorenzo is a Knightsbridge restaurant – once the favourite eatery of Princess Diana – where Fabio Capello and his number two, Franco Baldini, got their wires similarly crossed over another leadership issue.

 

That of the England captaincy.  The Sun article 18th March 2011, Steven

 

 

Mr Creosote: I’ll have the lot.  Monty Pythons The Meaning of Life 1983 starring Graham Chapman & John Cleese & Terry Gilliam & Eric Idle & Terry Jones & Michael Palin & Carol Cleveland & Patricia Quinn & Judy Loe & Simon Jones & Matt Frewer & Jane Leeves et al, director Terry Jones  

 

Waiter: ... Finally, monsieur, a wafer-thin mint.  ibid.

 

 

Hi, Guys.  Welcome to BBJ’s.  I’m your waitress for today.  My name is Amanda, but my friends call me Zebedee.  I’m a fiery Taurean with my moon in Uranus – careful!  I’ll do the jokes!  Ok guys, here’s the deal.  I can give you the menus.  But we’ve got a special promotion on this week where if you can tell us what we’ve got on the menus, you get entered into our mind-reading draw.  The Catherine Tate Show s2e3: BBJ’s, BBC 2005

 

 

Ok, guys, here’s the story on the menus – due to a non-human based error at head office ...  The Catherine Tate Show s2e9: with Una Stubbs  

 

 

You’re late.  Ah, it has been a shocker here.  Absolute shocker, hasn’t it Vernon?  Yeah you’re lucky you just missed the rush.  Double cheeseburger?  Double cheese for Nevil.  Yeah you missed it all go off earlier.  You never believe who was here.  Oh what's her name?  American woman.  Vernon, what’s the name of that woman who was here earlier ... Madonna!  They were on their way to the garden centre ... They run out of petrol ...  Only uses BP.  Apparently she’s collecting the nectar points.  Catherine Tate Show, motorway stand  

 

 

You got leaves with yours.  Big Night 1996 starring Tony Shalhoub & Stanley Tucci & Minnie Driver & Ian Holm & Isabella Rossellini & Caroline Aaron & Marc Anthony & Allison Janney & Campbell Scott & Susan Floyd & Pasquale Cajano et al, directors Campbell Scott & Stanley Tucci, wife to husband

 

To eat good food is to be close to God.  ibid.  chef

 

 

The kitchen grew dirtier and the rats bolder, though we trapped few of them.  Looking round that filthy room, with raw meat lying among refuse on the floor, and cold, clotted saucepans sprawling everywhere, and the sink blocked and coated with grease, I used to wonder whether there could be a restaurant in the world as bad as ours.  George Orwell, Down and Out in Paris and London

 

 

You’re a pair of animals!  Not one, not another living soul would have had the cruelty to walk out on the man in a restaurant!  Arthur Miller, Death of a Salesman, Linda      

 

 

In Britain’s not-too-distant past our relationship with food was such that for most people going for a meal outside of the home was not something done for pleasure.  But the dining-out experience was about to be transformed.  Spicing Up Britain: How Eating Out Went Exotic, BBC 2016

 

Migrants from Italy, China and the Indian sub-continent helped us develop a taste for eating out.  ibid.

 

Berni Inn: ‘Prawn Cocktail, Steak and Chips and Black Forest Gateau.’  ibid.

 

Italian cafés, or Bracchis [Guiseppi Bracchi], were a familiar sight throughout South Wales.  ibid.

 

Chinese restaurants soon became a favourite place to eat out, and by the 1960s there were over 2,000 of them.  ibid.  

 

 

You're eating a handtowel.  Spy 2015 starring Jude Law & Raad Rawi & Melissa McCarthy & Jessica Chaffin & Miranda Hart & Sam Richardson & Rose Byrne & Richard Brake & Katie Dippold & Jaime Pacheco & Romain Apelbaum & Jason Statham et al, him to her in restaurant

 

Please refrain from using the term Thundercunt.  ibid.  boss to McCarthy

 

 

Woman: Would you like to order, sir?

 

Thatcher: Yes, I will have a steak.

 

Woman: How do you like it?

 

Thatcher: Oh raw, please.  

 

Woman: And what about the vegetables?

 

Thatcher: Oh they’ll have the same as me.  Spitting Image

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