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52,365. There was a time
I could have said
Wooder been better
To stay in bed.
But now I say,
‘Let’s get up!’
Why?
Dunno.
Give up. esias, Time 1996/7
3,489. Hey diddle diddle
The cat and the fiddle,
God’s up there,
The devil’s down there
And here am I.
Trapped.
In the middle. (Life’s Like That & Cat & God & Devil & I & Epigram) esias, Life is a Steaming Pile of Donkey Doo-Doos c.1996
52,367.
z
z
z
z
z
z
z
z esias, Waiting For a Lecture 1996/7
52,368. Fishermen off the island of Tamarind
Wear stone blocks
Around their necks and ankles
Which keep them underwater
Till their deaths.
Unless a pearl-minded friend
Bewitched by a spout of mercy
Notices the flute of bubbles
And offers a hand of relief
To prolong the Torture of Life. (Epigram & Diving) esias, Pearl Fishers 2007
52,369. I have a flea.
He lives in the mat
By my feet.
I wonder
If he curses God
And hopes to die
Like me,
Or maybe Life is rosy
And complete
By sucking the blood
Of my feet.
Regurgitates Shakespeare
For fun, this fiend;
Fires his belly i’ the sun.
Live and let live, says the flea. (Epigram Poems & Flea) esias, The Penthouse 2009
96,719. I was working in the lab late one night
Squinting at a proton with all my might,
The brute double-bumped before my eyes –
And now I'm up for the Nobel Prize! (Proton & Epigram) esias, board post 7th January 2016 ‘Smashing Atoms’
74,772. And when the gorgeous coffin was laid low,
It seemed the mockery of hell to fold
The rottenness of eighty years in gold. (George III & Grave & Epigram) Lord Byron, on burial of George III
50,948. What is an Epigram? A dwarfish whole,
Its body brevity, and wit its soul. Samuel Taylor Coleridge 1772-1834, Epigram
49,650. What is a communist? One who has yearnings
For equal division of unequal earnings;
Idler or bungler, or both, he is willing
To fork out his penny and pocket his shilling. (Communism & Epigram) Ebenezer Elliott, Epigram 1850
50,949. If, with the literate, I am
Impelled to try an epigram,
I never seek to take the credit;
We all assume that Oscar said it. Dorothy Parker, Life magazine 2nd June 1927
1,051. Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song,
A medley of extemporanea;
And love is a thing that can never go wrong;
And I am Marie of Roumania. (Life’s Like That & Love & Epigram) Dorothy Parker, Comment
1,054. Guns aren’t awful;
Nooses give;
Gas smells awful;
You might as well live. (Life’s Like That & Suicide & Guns & Gas & Epigram) Dorothy Parker, Resume 1937
75,269. If I had a shiny gun
I could have a world of fun
Speeding bullets through the brains
Of the folks that cause me pains. (Gun & Epigram) Dorothy Parker
79,168. By the time you say you’re his,
Shivering and sighing
And he vows his passion is
Infinite, undying –
Lady, make a note of this:
One of you is lying. (Lies & Epigram & Romance) Dorothy Parker, Unfortunate Coincidence 1937
90,199. If wild my breast and sore my pride,
I bask in dreams of suicide,
If cool my heart and high my head
I think, How Lucky Are The Dead. (Suicide & Epigram) Dorothy Parker
90,226. I never see that prettiest thing –
A cherry bough gone white with Spring –
But what I think, How gay ’twould be
To hang me from a flowering tree. (Suicide & Tree & Epigram) Dorothy Parker, Not So Deep as a Well
50,950. Some say, that Signor Bononcini,
Compared to Handel’s a mere ninny;
Others aver, to him, that Handel
Is scarcely fit to hold a candle.
Strange! That such high dispute should be
’Twixt Tweedledum and Tweedledee. John Byrom, on feuds between Handel & Bononcini, The London Journal 5th June 1725
74,777. God bless the king, I mean the faith’s defender;
God bless – (no harm in blessing) – the pretender;
But who pretender is, and who is king,
God bless them all – that’s quite another thing. (George III & Epigram) John Byrom, Extempore Intended to Allay the Violence of Party Spirit
74,778. Come all ye foreign strolling gentry,
Into Great Britain make your entry;
Abjure the Pope, and take the oaths,
And you shall have meat, drink, and clothes. (George III & Epigram) John Byrom, Four Epigrams on the Naturalization Bill (I)