A E Housman - Jenny Eclair - Lew Jenkins - F Scott Fitzgerald - Johnny Depp - Dave Barry - Great Artists in Their Own Words TV - Rab C Nesbitt TV - Father Ted TV - Dennis Nilsen - Ray Donovan TV - Barfly 1987 - The Hustler 1961 - The Lost Weekend 1945 - Cat on a Hot Tin Roof 1958 - The Fugitive Kind 1960 - Star Trek: Voyager TV - George McClellan - Martin Amis TV - Roundhead or Cavalier: Which One Are You? TV - Casablanca 1942 - Nancy Astor & Winston Churchill - Lipstick aka Lois Long - Lord Byron - Benjamin Hapwoood Burt - Daniel Defoe - Samuel Johnson - William Shakespeare - George Carlin - Peter Ackroyd - Charles Dickens - David Sedaris - Christopher Hitchens - John Marcellus Huston - Ernest Hemingway - P J O’Rourke - Tracey Emin - Henny Youngman - Damien Hirst - Charles Baudelaire - Samuel Butler - Abigail’s Party 1977 - The Richard Burton Diaries TV - Charles Churchill - Monty Python’s The Life of Brian 1979 - Flight 2012 - Genesis 9:20&21 - Jeremiah 48:26 - Lamentations 4:21 - Joel 1:5&15 - Habakkuk 2:15 - Tobias 4:15 - Ephesians 5:18 - Alan Bleasdale TV - Ex Machina 2015 - John Gay - Henry Fielding - George Orwell - Peggy Guggenheim: Art Addict TV - Panorama TV - House of Cards 1990 - War Gin 2012 - Trailer Park Boys 2001-2018 - Once Upon a Time in America 2019 - Alexie Sayle TV -
Could man be drunk for ever
With liquor, love, or fights,
Lief should I rouse at morning
And lief lie down at nights.
But men at whiles are sober
And think by fits and starts,
And if they think, they fasten
Their hands upon their hearts. A E Housman
I hate it – hate it hate it hate it – when men say that women shouldn’t drink. Fuck off. If women didn’t get pissed, most of you wouldn’t get a shag. Jenny Eclair, on stage
‘I was drunk, paralysed drunk. I fell flat on my face getting in the ring. The referee had to come over and drag me over to the corner, put me on the stool.’ Lew Jenkins, cited Pete Heller
I’ve been drunk for about a week now, and I thought it might sober me up to sit in a library. F Scott Fitzgerald, 1896-1940, The Great Gatsby, 1925
When kids hit one year old, it’s like hanging out with a miniature drunk. You have to hold on to them. They bump into things. They laugh and cry. They urinate. They vomit. Johnny Depp
In the old days it was not called the Holiday Season: the Christians called it ‘Christmas’ and went to church; the Jews called it ‘Hanukkah’ and went to synagogue; the atheists went to parties and drank. People passing each other on the street would say ‘Merry Christmas!’ or ‘Happy Hanukkah!’ or (to the atheists) ‘Look out for the wall!’ Dave Barry
The World of Gilbert & George, directors Gilbert & George 1981: Living Sculptures ... ‘We like very much to be drunk’. Great Artists in Their Own Words III: But is it Art? Gilbert & George, BBC 2013
What is the point of being drunk if you canna be a wee bit disorderly? Rab C Nesbitt: Cell s3e6, Rab to cellmate, BBC 1993
Which one of you lucky people am I going to embarrass the hell out of? I know your funny little ways, boy. I was sober once. Rab C Nesbitt: Trips, Rab with Jamesie on bus, BBC 1999
We’re pissed. You’d have worked that out with your fully functioning scum detector. ibid.
Come on, do not fear our simply native ways – we’re post-modern but we’re very very happy. We sing. We dance. And we hunt for chips. We grow tumours and we die. ibid.
Don’t get upset – you’ll lose the benefit of the drink. ibid. Jamesie to Rab
Was Jesus blootered when he threw the money lenders out the temple? Rab C Nesbitt: Fight, Rab at pub table, BBC 2011
We think it’s a combination of Babysham and Harpic. Father Ted s1e2: Entertaining Father Stone, Doctor wheeling Father Jack into hospital, Channel 4 1995
It’s [murder] just a compulsion when I’m drunk. Dennis Nilsen
I got fucking drunk. And I shot him ... And it really fucked up me. Ray Donovan s1e12: Same Exactly starring Liev Schreiber & Paul Malcomson & Jon Voight & Eddie Marson & Dash Mihok & Steven Bauer et al, Sully, Showtime 2013
You could start by not getting drunk before 9 a.m. Ray Donovan s4e2: Marisol, Abby to Terry
He refuses to join the rat race – he drinks and he wakes. Barfly 1987 starring Mickey Rourke & Faye Dunaway & Alice Krige & J C Quinn & Frank Stallone & Jack Nance & Sandy Martin et al, director Barbet Schroeder, barman
Bloke in bar: What do you drink?
Rourke: Almost everything. ibid.
Some people never go crazy; what truly horrible lives they must live. ibid. Rourke
Rourke: What do you do?
Wanda: I drink. ibid.
We’re all in some kind of hell. ibid.
Anybody can be a non-drunk, but it takes a special talent to be a drunk. ibid.
I lie. When I’m drunk I lie. The Hustler 1961 starring Paul Newman & Jackie Gleason & Piper Laurie & George C Scott & Myron McCormick & Murray Hamilton & Stefan Gierasch et al, director Robert Rossen, her to him
I’m not a drinker; I’m a drunk. The Lost Weekend 1945 starring Ray Milland & Jane Wyman & Phillip Terry & Howard Da Silva & Doris Dowling & Frank Faylen & Mary Young & Anita Sharp-Bolster & Lilian Fontaine et al, director Billy Wilder, Don to Helen
Uncle Brick got drunk and broke his leg. Cat on a Hot Tin Roof 1958 starring Paul Newman & Elizabeth Taylor & Burl Ives & Judith Anderson & Jack Carson & Madeleine Sherwood & Larry Gates & Vaughn Taylor, director Richard Brooks, little girl
Son, you know you’ve a got a real liquor problem? ibid. Big Daddy to Brick
Yes, sir. I am an alcoholic. So if you’ll just excuse me. ibid. Brick to Big Daddy
When I’m drunk I can stand myself. ibid.
This country used to be wild but now it’s just drunk. The Fugitive Kind 1960 starring Marlon Brando & Anna Magnani & Joanne Woodward & Maureen Stapleton & Victor Jory & R G Armstrong & John Baragrey et al, director Sidney Lumet
You are intoxicated. Star Trek: Voyager s5e6: Timeless, Doctor to Seven of Nine
No one agent so much obstructs this army as the degrading vice of drunkenness. Total abstinence would be worth 50,000 men to the armies of the United States. General George McClellan
We’d be letting ourselves down if we didn’t talk about English drunkenness ... key to the national character. Martin Amis’s England, BBC 2014
It’s drowning their sorrows; it’s not celebratory. ibid.
It’s a source of quiet pride. ibid.
The Roundheads were confronted by a pleasure-loving people, and they were never happier than when they were getting drunk. Roundhead or Cavalier: Which One Are You? BBC 2012
Rozzer: What is your nationality?
Rick: I am a drunkard. Casablanca 1942 ***** starring Humphrey Bogart & Ingrid Bergman & Paul Henreid & Claude Rains & Conrad Veidt & Sydney Greenstreet & Peter Lorre & Curt Bois et al, director Michael Curtiz, rozzer
Nancy Astor: Sir, you’re drunk.
Winston Churchill: Madam, you’re ugly, but in the morning I shall be sober. apocryphal and possibly misattributed
Tomorrow we may die, so let’s get drunk and make love. Lipstick aka Lois Long
Man, being reasonable, must get drunk;
The best of life is but intoxication. Lord Byron, Don Juan
One evening in October, when I was one-third sober,
An’ taking home a ‘load’ with manly pride;
My poor feet began to stutter, so I lay down in the gutter,
And a pig came up an’ lay down by my side;
Then we sang, ‘It’s all fair weather when good fellows get together,’
Till a lady passing by was heard to say:
‘You can tell a man who boozes by the company he chooses,’
And the pig got up and slowly walked away. Benjamin Hapwood Burt, American songwriter