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★ Toilet

Toilet: see Urine & House & Home & Humour & Comedy & Romans & Sewage

Two Melons and a Stinking Fish TV - Trainspotting 1996 - Mary Beard TV - Penn & Teller TV - Ripley’s Believe It Or Not! 2006 - Gertrude Stein - Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery 1997 - The British TV - The Young Ones TV - James Burke TV - The Royle Family TV - Edward VIII - Ken Loach TV - Tommy Cooper - Ken Dodd - The Italian Job 1969 - Kenneth Williams TV - Not Only But Also 1966 - George Carlin - Andrew Marr TV - Carry on Behind 1975 - The Proof is Out There TV -   

 

 

11,730.  I’ve always liked toilets.  (Artists: Lucas & Toilet)  Two Melons and a Stinking Fish, BBC 2013, Sarah

 

 

20,266.  The worst toilet in Scotland.  (GBH Films & Toilet)  Trainspotting 1996 starring Ewan McGregor & Ewen Bremner & Robert Carlyle & Kevin McKidd & Kelly MacDonald & Peter Mullan & Keith Allen & James Cosmo et al, director Danny Boyle

 

 

59,527.  This is a Roman communal toilet ... 144 public latrines in downtown Rome.  (Romans & Toilet)  Professor Mary Beard, Meet the Romans II: Street Life

 

 

87,450.  In the 1920s a Seattle dentist patented the perfect medical solution: the paper toilet-seat cover ... These goddamn things are everywhere.  (Safety & Toilet)  Penn & Teller, Bullshit! Safety Hysteria s2e2

 

 

90,402.  It is illegal to flush the toilet after 10 p.m. if you live in an apartment.  (Switzerland & Toilet)  Ripleys Believe It Or Not! 2006

 

 

60,051.  In France one must adapt oneself to the fragrance of a urinal.  (France & Toilet)  Gertrude Stein

 

 

70,454.  Austin Powers: What exactly do you do, Number Two?

 

Number Two: That’s my business.  Now, if you’ll excuse me I have to go to the little boys’ room.  (Do & Toilet)  Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery 1997 starring Mike Myers & Elizabeth Hurley & Robert Wagner & Seth Green & Mindy Sterling & Michael York & Fabiana Udenio & Will Ferrell & Mimi Rogers & Joe Son & Paul Dillon & Charles Napier et al, director Jay Roach

 

 

30,448.  From this moment the expression ‘to spend a penny’ was said to enter the English language.  Jennings’ invention is a huge success.  (Great Britain & England & Toilet)  The British VI: Tale of Two Cities

 

 

43,108.  We never clean the toilet, Neil.  That’s what being a student is all about.  (Comedy & Student & Toilet)  The Young Ones: Sick, Rick, BBC 1984

 

 

91,440.  I’m going off now to stuff loads and loads of paper down the toilet.  The Young Ones: Bambi, Vyvyan

 

 

67,261.  The English only spent that money because they were desperate for any form of sanitation.  Because of a terrifying disease they had imported from India: Cholera.  Terrifying because by the mid-nineteenth century it had killed 100,000 people in England and they hadn’t the faintest idea what caused it or how to stop it.  (Civilisation & Toilet)  James Burke: Connections s2e5: Something For Nothing, BBC 1994

 

67,262.  The new thing to have was a lavatory.  Everyone wanted one. (Civilisation & Toilet)  ibid.

 

 

72,363.  There’s nowhere like your own toilet.  (Family & Toilet)  The Royle Family s2e2: Family Lunch s2e2, Nana, BBC 1999

 

 

72,863.  Perhaps one of the only positive pieces of advice that I was ever given was that supplied by an old courtier who observed: Only two rules really count.  Never miss an opportunity to relieve yourself; never miss a chance to sit down and rest your feet.  (Feet & Toilet & Edward VIII & Urine)  Edward VIII

 

 

76,094.  I think this is the only tenement block in Islington where you can sit in the toilet with your door open and cook your breakfast at the same time.  (Homelessness & Toilet)  Ken Loach, The Wednesday Play: Cathy Come Home, story Jeremy Sandford ***** BBC 1966

 

 

80,352.  Well, my wife and I were married in a toilet – it was a marriage of convenience!  (Marriage & Toilet)  Tommy Cooper

 

 

91,436.  Q) How many men does it take to change a toilet roll?

 

A) Nobody knows.  It’s never been tried before.  Ken Dodd

 

 

91,437.  Last night, Mr Governor, my toilet was broken into.  Broken into.  There are some places that to an Englishman are sacred.  The Italian Job 1969 starring Michael Caine & Noel Coward & Benny Hill & Raf Vallone & Tony Beckley & Rossano Brazzi & Maggie Blye & Irene Handl & John le Mesurier & Fred Emney et al, director Peter Collinson, Mr Bridger to prison governor

 

 

91,438.  Nobody is allowed to use my lavatory.  Kenneth Williams, Fantabulosa! BBC 2020

 

 

91,439.  Peter Cook: Good evening, sir.

 

John Lennon as uniformed toilet attendant: Excuse me, sir.  Are you a member? ... There is a £5 waiting list.  Not Only But Also 1966  

 

 

91,441.  You know an odd feeling?  Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar.  George Carlin      

 

 

137,155.  Jayaben Desia: One of the most notorious industrial disputes had begun: Grunwick … She hadn’t planned to start the strike but she was a natural … Reporter: Why are you on strike?

 

Desai: We have to ask permission to go to the toilet.  (Elizabeth II & Great Britain & Strike & Toilet & Dispute)  New Elizabethans with Andrew Marr II: A Brave New World, BBC 2020  

 

 

61,064.  Arthur – there is no need for that!  Carry on Behind 1975 starring Kenneth Williams & Elke Sommer & Bernard Bresslaw & Kenneth Connor & Jack Douglas & Joan Sims & Windsor Davies & Peter Butterworth & Liz Fraser & Patsy Rowlands & Ian Lavender & Donald Hewlett et al, director Gerald Thomas, Sims to Breslaw

 

61,065.  Oooh, I feel so queer.  ibid.  Williams hospitalised

 

61,066.  Oooh-er, stop messing about!  ibid.  Williams

 

 

141,230.  Malaysia 2017: a man is about to step into his sister’s bathroom when he notices something crawling out of the toilet.  The 28 year old immediately rushes out to tell his sister who whips out her camera and captures this video: the footages shows a strange slithering creature emerging out of the bathroom with its head poking out of the door …  (Malaysia & Monster & Sewer & Toilet)  The Proof is Out There s2e5, History 2022