William Shakespeare - Woody Allen - Kirsty Young - Robert Frost - The Deconstructors 1974 - Catch 22 1970 - C S Lewis - Arthur Miller & Death of a Salesman 2006 - George H W Bush - Quintus Fabius Maximus - Aravind Adiga - The Catherine Tate Show TV - Numbers Game: What Drives You Crazy? TV – George Bernard Shaw – Steve D Levitt & Stephen J Dubner - The Office UK - The Office Values - The Office US – David Brent: Life on the Road 2016 - The Pelican Brief 1993 - Fargo 2017 -
1,194. To be, or not to be – that is the question.
Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles,
And by opposing end them? – To die – to sleep –
No more; and by a sleep to say we end
The heart-ache, and the thousand natural shocks
That flesh is heir to; ’tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wished. To die – to sleep –
To sleep! Perchance to dream. Aye, there’s the rub;
For in that sleep of death what dreams may come,
When we have shuffled off this mortal coil,
Must give us pause. There’s the respect
That makes calamity of so long life.
For who would bear the whips and scorns of time,
The oppressor’s wrong, the proud man’s contumely,
The pangs of despised love, the law’s delay,
The insolence of office...’ (Life’s Like That & Be & Question & Noble & Mind & Suffer & Fortune & Arms & Trouble & Opposition & Death & Pain & Suicide & Dream & Oppress & Law & Office & Fortunate) William Shakespeare, Hamlet, III i 56-73
68,879. Organized crime in America takes in over forty billion dollars a year and spends very little on office supplies. (Crime & Office) Woody Allen
5,237. You didn’t have to read the books to be touched by their inspirational message. Our conference rooms and open-plan offices were now echoing to the sound of management speak. (Work & Office & Management) Kirsty Young, The British at Work: The Age of Uncertainty 1995 - Now
6,614. The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office. (Brain & Office) Robert Frost
22,889. I hate this office. Most of all I hate this desk. (GBH Films & Office & Work) The Destructors aka The Marseilles Contract 1974 starring Michael Caine & Anthony Quinn & James Mason & Maurice Ronet & Alexandra Stewart & Maureen Kerwin & Catherin Rouvel & Marcel Bozzuffi et al, director Robert Parrish, Quinn to secretary
27,007. I don’t want anyone to come in and see me while I’m in my office. (World War II & Office) Catch 22 1970 Starring Alan Arkin & Martin Balsam & Richard Benjamin & Arthur Garfunkel & Jack Gilford & Anthony Perkins & Martin Sheen & Jon Voight & Orson Welles & Buck Henry & Bob Newhart & Paula Prentiss et al, director Mike Nichols, pilots' mess Yossarian, Major Major
47,717. I live in the Managerial Age, in a world of Admin. The greatest evil is not now done in those sordid ‘dens of crime’ that Dickens loved to paint. It is not done even in concentration camps and labour camps. In those we see its final result. But it is conceived and ordered (moved, seconded, carried and minuted) in clean, carpeted, warmed and well-lighted offices, by quiet men with white collars and cut fingernails and smooth-shaven cheeks who do not need to raise their voices. Hence, naturally enough, my symbol for Hell is something like the bureaucracy of a police state or the office of a thoroughly nasty business concern. (Evil & Office & Business) C S Lewis, The Screwtape Letters preface
72,305. What am I doing in an office making a contemptuous begging fool of myself? (Family & Office & Fool) Arthur Miller, Death of a Salesman 2006 starring Xavarian Dramatic Society, Warren Able Theatre starring Daniel Valez & Amanda Magnavita & Michael Longo & Michael Maldonado et al, Biff
83,572. You don’t have to go to college to be a success ... We need the people who run the offices, the people who do the hard physical work of our society. (Office & Work & College & Success) George H W Bush
83,573. To be turned from one’s course by men’s opinions, by blame, and by misrepresentation shows a man unfit to hold office. Quintus Fabius Maximus
83,574. There’s no one else in this 150-square-foot office of mine. Just me and a chandelier above me, although the chandelier has a personality of its own. It’s a huge thing, full of small diamond-shaped glass pieces, just like the ones they used to show in the films of the 1970s. Though it’s cool enough at night in Bangalore, I’ve put a midget fan – five cobwebby blades – right above the chandelier. See, when it turns, the small blades chop up the chandelier’s light and flight it across the room. Just like the strobe light at the best discos in Bangalore. This is the only 150-square-foot space in Bangalore with its own chandelier! Aravind Adiga, The White Tiger p7
51,191. We’ve gone back to work. We’ve got in the lift. Next thing I know the lift stops. The doors have opened. She’s walked out. I’ve followed her out. I take one look around me. I’m only on the fifth floor ain’t I. I’m only on the fifth floor in Human Resources. I know. I’m on the fifth floor in Human Resources; I was supposed to be down on the third in Personnel. Well we have gone off into uncontrollable hysterics ... (Laughter & Office) The Catherine Tate Show series I, Paul and Sam
83,575. Guess how much I paid for all that? How much did I pay for all that? Just have a guess. It doesn’t matter, just have a guess. On-suite bathroom. Take a wild guess. Camel rides. Have a guess! Have a guess! It doesn’t matter. It won’t kill you. Have a guess! Say a number. Eighty pounds? Eighty pounds? I’m going to Egypt not phoning it ... Shove it up your arse! (Office & Guess) The Catherine Tate Show series I, bully-woman to woman in office
83,576. Guess how long it took me? How long did it take me to get to Cornwall? (Office & Guess) The Catherine Tate Show s1e6
83,577. Guess how far I ran last night? How far did I run last night? I don’t think so. Have a guess. Think like an athlete. Just guess ... We’re just having a laugh – guess ... Eight hundred metres. (Office & Guess) ibid.
83,578. Guess what I’m thinking? Yeah. Freak. (Office & Guess) ibid.
83,579. I did my salsa class last night. I just can’t get the music out of my head. I never thought of myself as a dancer. But it turns out I’m rather good, Donny says. Donny my instructor ... Guess how old he thought I was. How old did Donny think I looked? Why not, have a guess ... Sixteen? Sixteen? He’s not blind. (Office & Guess) The Catherine Tate Show s2e2, office bully to woman
83,580. Guess where he [hairdresser] comes from? Go on, have a guess where my hairdresser is from? You’ll never guess. Because it’s fun! Have a guess ... You love it! Just guess. (Office & Guess) The Catherine Tate Show
83,581. Is that cake? I thought that was cake. Is everyone having cake? ... I’m not having any cake. I’m cutting down ... Guess how much weight I’ve lost? ... I don’t like here and that’s it. I said, Look darling, I’m not being funny, I don’t mean nothing by it, but I don’t want you coming up here any more if you don’t mind. (Office & Guess) The Catherine Tate Show, women in office
83,582. How many extras do you think there are in Ben Hur ...Come on, how many bloody extras? ... A quarter of a million? In one film? Half a million sandals ... Eight thousand. Yes it is. Oh get a life! (Office & Guess) ibid.
83,405. Biggest pet peeve in the office: office loud talker. (Numbers & Work & Office) Numbers Game: What Drives You Crazy?
92,187. A man who has no office to go to - I don't care who he is – is a trial of which you can have no conception. (Unemployment & Office) George Bernard Shaw
96,744. Smaller offices are more honest than big ones. (Cheat & Office) Steven D Levitt & Stephen J Dubner, Freakonomics
83,585. Don’t ever come out with me and Finchy. The Office: Downsize s1e1, Brent to Dawn
83,586. You can’t put a price on comedy. (Office & Comedy) ibid. Brent to temp
83,587. I thought I’d found a lump. ibid. Brent to Dawn
83,588. I suppose I’ve created an atmosphere where I’m a friend first and a boss second, probably entertainer third. (Office & Boss) ibid. Brent to new temp
83,589. I will not have her tunnel banded about this office willy-nilly. The Office: Work Experience s1e2, Brent to staff
83,590. There’s a weight of intellect behind my comedy. (Office & Comedy) ibid. Brent
83,591. I am trained in covert operations. ibid. Gareth
83,592. I could catch a monkey. If I was starving I could. I’d make poison darts out of the poison of the deadly frogs. One milligram of that poison can kill a monkey. Or a man. Prick yourself and you’d be dead within a day. Or longer. Different frogs, different times. ibid.
83,593. What’s black and slides down Nelson’s Column? Winnie Mandela. The Office: The Quiz s1e3, Finch's joke on dog n bone to Brent
83,594. I’m more sort of character-based and he's more of a gag-man. I do gags as well. (Office & Comedy) ibid. Brent
83,595. He’s a vegetable now. And that’s something we've all got to look forward to. (Office & Old Age) ibid.
83,596. Yeah, there are limits to my comedy. (Office & Comedy) ibid.
83,597. Whatever happens it won’t be a flashy wedding. Nah, yeah, just be a registry office to save money. And then what we'll probably do is move in with me mum for a few months. Yeah, let Dawn get a few kiddies under her belt which will be nice ’cause then me mum can look after them. (Office & Wedding & Marriage) ibid. Lee
83,598. The thing about long-term marriage is that inevitably the sex suffers. (Office & Marriage) The Office: Training s1e4, Gareth
83,599. Gareth: All farmers have wives.
Tim: He’s gay.
Gareth: Well then he shouldn’t be allowed near animals, should he? (Office & Homosexual) ibid.
83,600. Now you’ve split up with Lee, would you like to come out for a drink with me? (Office & Drink) ibid. Tim